Imagine making 10,000 dollars a day, having the world’s largest free dating site, and still having a crappy design. Imagine having the world’s largest social network and having the world’s worst designs and what this means in the real world. Haven’t you ever wondered why the ugly guy is banging the hottest chick? Does size really matter?

Yes all these thoughts were running through my head after listening to the 2WebCrew Podcast with Plenty of Fish’s Markus Frind. This podcast was one of the most boring podcasts ever. No offense Duncan. It was more like a conversation at the bar. But that’s alright I still learned a lot. Markus Frind wanted to keep everything a secret which is fine but why have a podcast if your going to say I can’t comment on this every five minutes. The truth of the matter is 80% of what ugly people do to win dates is a mystery to them, they try to cloud this in an air of mystery. This has never fooled me. Just like ugly sites. Sometimes you stumble onto success but you don’t know the answers to why. Well for the first time ever you are going to find out what the answers to these and other valuable secrets.

Do you want to be as rich as Markus Frind ?
Do you want to bang the hottest chicks? (figuratively speaking — I’ve heard the hotties actually have a higher ration of STD’s so I stick with the ugly ones) Do you want to the be net’s next zillionaire? Of course you do. And if you send me 19.99 in a SASE I promise you I will reveal to you the secrets you’ve been dying to know. Just kidding.

Let’s talk it over. Sit down for a second. Lean back turn down the music. It’s really very simple. My Dad taught me these valuable lessons years ago. I forget them, ignored them and blocked them from my memory. Only to have them return to me on day while drinking. And they are in my upcoming Ebook im writting with the hilarious and better looking Chris Pearson. A lot of people are pestering me what my next thing is. Truthfully I figured out my next big thing a few weeks ago. I was in a daze — I was drunken and had just watched this really hot chick bring me my favorite beer in the world. I was determined to find out the secret ugly guys have in winning over the drop head hot girls. The answers weren’t in any book at Barnes and Noble. I looked. The answers weren’t in Blog Marketing, or Blog Wild. But the answers were as simple as Grandma’s Apple Pie.

1) Give them what they want
Markus Frind’s Plenty of Fish gives online daters what they want. What do they want? They want free, and they want familiarity. Truth of the matter is most the internet in our early days was pretty shitty. It was made in Front Page and had horrible graphics. This site fulfills three basic needs. It’s usable,its free, and it’s familiar. A lot of Web 2.0 is hyper-usable meaning its overused. It’s too fucking user friendly. All the icons, all the rounded corners. It’s so sticky and gewwy you have to worried your going to get stuck. Markus avoided this trap by not outsourcing this. He probably put the site together himself. Probably in FrontPage.

In the real world Girls just want you to give them what they want. Whether its fulfillment of pre-existing insecurities, fulfillment of socioanxieties,detachment from reality,sex, or money. You have to figure out what she wants and fulfill her desire or if you don’t want to fulfill the desire you must walk away immediately without any regrets. Especially if you can never make her happy. The internet is no different. However you have a much larger audience, and therefore a much greater chance of success than on trying to please one woman. Instead you can pick one market, one niche within one market, and go out attempt to win over the majority of that market and make them yours for life. Ala 9rules, Ala 37signals. Ala Google. Google actually begin as a small market. Look how it snowballed.

2) Speak their language
After Markus Frind’s Podcast I picked up on an amazing connection. I was pondering all the shizzbang that News Corp owns (later I will devote an entire post to this topic) and how I would leverage it to make it a much more friendly yet relationship based corporation. Mind you I have no college degree and am considered a humble bloke from the woods. However I’m learning to undertand the MySpace Population. I’m learning to speak their language. The Myspace crowd is a lovey dovey population, its also a hate filled population. It’s a young population that is much different than our parents. The MySpace generation has been exposed to more in a shorter period of time. Consider all the school shootings. Consider 9/11, the first attack on the mainland in our history. Consider all the useless wars we are fighting, the taking away of our rights, consider our socio-economic dumbing down. The MySpace is the Underground America. It’s where the future wars will be fought for the minds and hearts of Americans. The MySpace generation is highly emotional. It’s very real. Many people on MySpace communicate on Myspace better on MySpace than in real life. To them MySpace is a reality. If a friend dies on MySpace the emotional impact is just as great as if a “real life” friend dies for us. MySpace however is less about country borders and more about the shaping of a global community based on relationships. It’s friends without borders. Many people on Myspace use it to communicate with people they have been friends with but are separated with. Many people on MySpace could care less about commercialization of society but desire to recreate some community that they most definetly have lost due to broken relationships at home, a bitter war, and a fucked up reality being drowned out by commercialization. This is why the bands have found a home on MySpace because Music is about
putting into real life what we are feeling in our hearts. You learned earlier to find your niche. Once you’ve found it. Learn to speak their language. If that’s the MySpace crowd great tap into it. If its the Web Designer Crowd tap into it. Find a niche and begin to speak their language. Communicate in methods that they will understand and will resonate with their passions,desires, and will leave them feeling fulfilled and not used.

In the real world its the same. Girls want you to speak their language. This particular girl is twice as hot as me. But she loves to talk. And I love to listen. She desires to explore life and I’ve explored a lot already. So in some ways I allow her to live vicariously through me. Likewise on the net you have to make your audience feel like they are living through you. This is what Hollywood has been doing for a long time. If you want success make your audience feel like they are apart of your success not a biproduct of it.

3) Shut up and listen
Sometimes you have to shut up and listen. Let me reflect on some past relationships. My biggest “mistakes” — which aren’t really mistakes but are lessons — have come when I wouldn’t shut up and I wouldn’t listen. Likewise in business sometimes our biggest mistake is not listening to the people around us. I’ve struggled with this. I am a man of ideas. Someone who thinks up a new business nearly every day and puts myself in a small circle of advisors because I trust them. But with that trust comes the need and desire to listen. If I want success I have to listen to the people I put my trust in. I don’t always have to do what they tell me to do. But I have to hear them out, glean as much from them as possible and attempt to make a great decision based on their wisdom. In the end it really comes down to heart and passion. Do I actually desire to listen to the people I trust, do I actually want to shut up and fucking open my ears to the wisdom of the people I surround myself with? Or am I going to go down the road of the brokenhearted. Which by the way is the reality of everyone else who isn’t successful.

In real life Girls would love it if you shut up and listen every now and again. It really doesn’t matter if you conceded to each and every argument. Although that would make them all the more happy. More than anything they want to feel like you are the one who wants more than anything else in the entire world to hear their advice. They want you to be The One who cares so much that you respect their ideas, their desires, and the longings of their blood sucking money grubbing hearts. (Notice I still haven’t grown up). Girls want the attention. They want to feel your trust. In the end yes, ugly guys probably do this better. Because they are more in touch with reality and have their egos more in check. They have more to lose by being brokenhearted. They have more to lose by losing that really hot girl. So in turn they make her feel more fulfilled. They make her feel like The One that matters. In the end its not about Ugly vs Hot. It’s about the ability to listen, and to fulfill.

In business its just the same. Do you listen to your customers? Are they more than customers. Are they friends of your brand? And do your customers, who now feel like friends of your brand feel fulfilled by this engagement or transaction? Because if they don’t you are missing something. Likewise in reality if you can’t fulfill the needs of that girl please do yourself a favor and walk away. And if you can never fulfil the desire of the needy customer its time to simplify your business and begin to communicate with your customers.

Blogs are a great way to do this. Like wise your blog is a great place to launch a business. Even if your blog only has a handful of readers. I would much rather have a business launch with a handful of customers who believe in my brand than launch a business with 10 million dollars in extra cash. And that’s what Web 3.0 really is. It’s about communicating and leveraging your friends into developing the only the brand that matters and that’s yours.

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