Who Wants to Have Sex With Sarah Palin?
Let’s cut to the chase. Like every hot-blooded man in America, I have a question. The answer which, could help determine who our next president will be.
WHEN WILL WE SEE SARAH PALIN NAKED?
Don’t deny it. Don’t think I’m pervert. Just admit it. You’ve wondered too.
Perhaps it’s all of those 80s B-movies I used to rent. But every time I see her speak, I feel like she is seconds away from taking the chopsticks out of her hair (or whatever holds that nest up), shake it out, and rip open her blouse.
I’m not usually attracted to God-fearing hockey-moms, but in this case, age disparity can suck it. I say bring on the May/December romance. There’s nothing misogynistic about this post, only truth.
It could be that I’m simply excited that I’ll have the chance to sleep with a president. Of course, that would take McCain croaking in office (not likely if he has mother Roberta’s genes); Todd Palin packing up and moving out to head to college; and an inordinate amount of alcohol for all involved parties. While I realize the odds are slim, at least there ARE odds. With a dude in the Oval Office, the opportunity doesn’t exist for the hetero population. But with Sarah Palin, men finally get to experience the possibility that regular woman have enjoyed for 43 presidents: that the chance of sex exists.
When typing “Sarah Palin” and the word “sex” into Google, one of the first results claims “Watch Sarah Palin Sex Tape Online.” I might be naive enough to think I have a chance of sleeping over at the cute little house on the southeast corner of 34th Street and Massachusetts Avenue (The VP suite), but I know that such a video doesn’t exist. At least it hasn’t fallen into the hands of the Dems yet.
Cable news can’t say it. The politicos can’t say it. But Jack of All Blogs can. The election has taken on a new dynamic. The GOP has brought us T&A. I’m not saying that it will win McCain the election, but if wars can be fought over a woman, don’t be foolish enough to think it couldn’t dictate who sits in the Oval Office.
